Last day of the month

So today is the end of February which means some of us are worried about rent and all those bills. Some people who were born on a leap year have understandably more pressing issues to worry about but hey...what are the odds of that(one in four). To those of you who have radios and are within a 100km radius of Barberton, listen to BCR as from tommorow and tell me what time my good friend Kliffoday is on air. Mail me your answers to lihwak@gmail.com or call 0822285619 and you could stand a chance to party with me(if you are female your chances increase considerably) ... ohh and Kliff just might make an appearence.(hopefully not)

Anyway celebrities aside arent you just glad the so called month of love is over, for a month with so few days it really does take its toll on the pocket....and "they" say you cant buy love.Ever realised how women are like condoms, they spend more time in your wallet than on your dick. For those of you who werent so lucky this month, shame on you.(Were you expecting advice or words of inspiration?)At least I did do you guys a favour I killed Cupid so dont worry about spoiling your so called beloved next year, spoil me instead. I accept VISA....



Later

Win a mazda

So Mazda is running a competition on my blog, if you can spot the sleepy student in the picture below you stand to win a brand new Mazda 6, competition date closes on the end of March all you have to do is post your answer and your name + contact details in the comments box and the car could be all yours. Each participant is limited to one answer. Good luck ..... you will need it.

Am I in love

I have never been one to lie about the things that matter and the unfortunate thing about the way things have turned out has proven to be some poetic justice of some kind. There was a certain girl who I did not love at first but pretended I did until in actual fact I fell for her. By then she was falling out of love with me ( with the help of some other guy of course). By the time she felt nothing 4 me, my feelings had blossomed to the point of obsession. In a stupid act of selflessness I listened to ‘they’ and let her go with the stupid belief that if its meant to be it will come back..and all that other bullshit. So far she has come and gone back to lots of guys, me excluded and although my heart has hope my head has reason. Love may be blind but I am not and I don't have to be a rocket scientist to figure out she does not want me. But although I am no longer in love with her fact is I love her for the simple fact that she made me feel things no other woman had been able to before her. I never knew the thin line between love and hate until I met her, and for the first time in my life I felt that heart wrenching emotion called jealousy. Then it sank, I do feel after all and with that the flood gates to my emotional barrier were opened and a whole charade of emotions began to gush out of me. I wasn't the calm collected charmer I always presented, I became this insecure unstable pathetic emotional wreck and looking back I can see why she lost interest in me. Then you think that you have learned from your lessons and fast foward to the present time and although the cast has changed the story is still somewhat similar. To make a long story short I am seriously fucked..

Oral sex

OK so we have all read this joke( I would have said heard but have you noticed how e-mails are cornering the joke market ) about an elderly couple whose idea of oral sex is her shouting "fuck you" from across the room and him shouting "fuck you too" and then they get into their separate bedrooms and sleep. If that's oral sex then lots of guys out there are throwing insults at each other are gay... anyway not to be outdone I came up with a poem of my own.

Oral sex

Making love through words
Intimate foreplay in these verbs

Every jingle caresses my earlobes
Before penetrating my mind with gentle strokes

Should I explain the sensation it invoked
When she whispered and when she spoke

Her voice angelic in its chord
Inviting me to its holy abode

Erecting my senses, she strokes my nerves
Naked and shameless, those were her words

She started slow and picked up speed
The more she says the more I need

This beautiful sensation with a twist of greed
She speaks I listen, that's how we breed.

Our satisfaction is achieved in the anticipation
Only when you have none, can you fulfill your expectations


As you will notice I passed 'Yes dear 101' with flying colours, always listen to your woman or at least pretend to. Sweetie if you are reading this ignore the 'pretend to' part. So anyway that is my attempt at poetry.

VALENTINES WEEK

Nice weekend was at afrosliqs party on saturday didn't get too sloshed out of respect, but diva u have too many male friends get some female friends to balance the equation. Anyhow it is Valentines week I am so broke I have less money than when I had no money at all. Am thinking of being a total jerk and get dumped by my better halves until the valentines hype is over then get back to speaking terms with them again.

So we are all anticipating tupacs latest album for this year, is the guy dead or did black people need their own version of elvis??? For those who have seen me and mistaken me for the younger version of 2pac, let me set the record straight no we are not related....as far as I know. Besides I am better looking.

Chappelle Show (Lost Ep.) - Tupac is alive

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Anyhow last week Tuesday I attended the premiere to the movie Catch a fire and its inspiring how simple people live amazing lives, but before I get all sentimental and shit on you I urge you to go watch the movie it is now showing in cinemas countrywide.

Later

Happy Birthday

My dear friend afrosliq diva is having her 23rd birthday today, damn you're old. They say with age comes wisdom, I wish that was true in your case but its a pity that "they" arent always right. Just joking happy birthday gal.... So when is the party?

Another take on relationships

Chris Rock - View On Love and Relationships

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Love is in the air...

....amongst other pungent scents it being so hot nowadays, anyway had an interesting weekend full of love triangles, rectangles and all those other angles. Beer sure does make things more interesting. Any how was thinking of our back in the days love when we would actually make use of the post office to write to our beloved and send them pictures of us in ridiculous postures (kind of like the pics I took of myself) and we would include dedications from K-Ci and Jojo...If you have never sent or received such a letter in your life my deepest condolences are with you. Back then courting was a process, nowadays with the right car and cash you can skip the whole thing and jump straight to bed after the initial greeting....thats if you go as far as saying something to each other.

For the benefit of todays generation I decided to remind you of the old day charm.....it worked too,so dont laugh you are probably a product of it.

Dear Sugar


Time and ability plus double capacity has forced my pen to dance automatically on this benedicted sheet of paper. Why! this miraculous thing happened is because papie I love you spontaneously and as I stand horizontal to the wall and perpendicular to the ground I only think of you, since you are a fantastic and fabulous guy. papie please Stop haranguing with the feelings in my heart because I love you more than a snake loves rat. To me each day starts by thinking of you and ends by dreaming of you. Each time I see you my metabolism suddenly stops and my peristalysis goes in reverse gear My medular-oblandata also stops functioning.

Crazy crazy crazy you may say but this is true. If only you knew what is going on in my encephalon you would understand. That's why I need to see you face to face with you, soon. I think I have to pen-off hear because I still haven't finished studying electrolysis and polymerization. Catch you pa- later. Sleep tight and don't let those bed bugs ever bite you coz you are too sweet a thing for them.

Yourz Ever,
Sugar nonoza


And the equally fantabulous reply

Dear Honie

My Love, My Sugar, i was exasperated with pride to have received one from you, the lungs in my body flapped with joy when i have been reading your letter. Anyway by now you have reached the realisations to why i am jotting this small letter to you, yes it is to see if you are keeping with the sands of time.

How is everything on that other side of yours? Well here everything is just half lemon half sugar to makeit schweppes. How is your schooling? How are you pulling the wagons of life? I am just pulling the schooling thing like a donkey pulling a cart.

My honie, i am missing you very much right now, my heart is perambulating with every word that i write, if it was not for these oceans that decided to flow between us then i would get on the next bus to come and see you, but until then i know that i will not hesitate to put this blue blood on this paper and write to you. I remember that day lovie, that one sweet day as Maria Curry sanged it, you know that it is my favorites song honie, the one day that we were boarding the combies and you escorted me to my home, walking with you just brought sweet dreams to me for the rest of my life honie.

If words of love could ride a bicycle I would be competing against Diego Maradona. Anyways, i will not stop you from reading the books that give you life and education so I will stop here for today.

Please always writing to me because I am missing you like sugar misses tea. You can see my foto below

My dedications to you are :


Maria Curry - One Sweet Day.

Boys to Main - And of the Rod

Keep well my mop of my heart, Yours in flesh and in blood, Ruise Sugar Baby

P.S. Sorry about my english, I did not learn anymore



Now that is classic....