Friday decided to go to jozi on a whim just to go see the girlfriend who dumped me via sms, came back on Sunday because I was broke but managed to get myself undumped in the process. While I was there I remembered the reason I left Yeoville in the first place (from my previous blog) and I realised that running from a place doesnt erase the past.
The rain may wash away the blood stains but the pain will still remain, forever forged in my brain. This blame I inflict on myself keeps piling up like books on a shelf and when I close my eyes all I can see are these looks for help. The tears in their eyes are like acid to my my mind dissolving all sense. My present feels like past tense, moving foward in motions but my emotions are trapped back in that time and these thoughts keep replaying in my mind like a bad rhyme.
So anyway Monday Sasco had a birthday at X's place and I was drinking Jack Daniels on the rocks (exercising the liver, the green bottles arent much of a challenge these days) and well it was interesting. Didnt pass out and wake up with a naked chic like the last time ... ahhhh,the good old days.
Anyway as you can see from the random senseless writing my mind isnt exactly here, I am writing exams soon and I am still thinking about how I should study.
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1 comment:
I just love the way you use such eloquently cultured and ladylike english, if only more women like you.
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