Sorry to point out the obvious but I never understood the importance of this day until I started working. Talking about pointing out the obvious had an interesting chat with the Diva over a couple of drinks (I should look into getting sponsorship from SAB) about those silly questions we ask. You know what I am talking about ... for instance when you walk in on your bestfriend rubbing your girlfriends clitoris as if he is trying to start a fire and you ask 'what are you doing?', you can see what he is doing but you insist on asking anyway. Or calling the woman you are stalking in the middle of the night and when they answer you ask them,'Are you awake?'... dah! Or telling a girl you want her and she asks you what it is you want exactly? Sex obviously and then when she kicks you in the balls for being so obvious she asks you if it hurt, as if you would be clutching your balls with your face twisted in agony because it didn't. Like me asking if you are reading this blog, now that is plain stupid.
Kasie Kulture promised to visit this weekend, lets just hope he drinks .... a lot.
Diva I have nothing against women, after all they are the better sex, they are better at lying, using, cheating e.t.c. I just think you guys acting all innocent as if you are victims is a little overplayed. If you can get away with calling us dogs and categorizing us into this one stereotype, then we guys have the right to do the same. Just think of me as a male rights activist.
Later
Friday, March 23, 2007
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
I will be on Radio
Kliff invited me to his show...finally..he will be on air from 2am on Wednesday and unfortunately I wont be allowed to talk much but I will play the mega mix. Remember its 104.1 FM BCR. I typed the last part slowly to make sure you got it.
Equal rights
So to prove that my mind has a broader scope to the things in life I decided to tackle the hypocrisy of equal rights. Think about it we all know women can do anything men do, even peeing while standing upright (saw that in a porn movie). My question is this ... in their pursuit to be recognized as equals aren't they defeating their own cause by forming feminine associations aimed at countering the existing male dominated ones?Notice I said male dominated ... they aren't exclusive to males though. Why do they feel the need to add a 'W' in front of all existing associations like the NBA for instance, now you have the WNBA. It is not as if the NBA doesn't really allow women to play e.g Dennis Rodman, it is just that men have been the dominant players. If female basketball players really wanted to be recognized as equals they would penetrate the NBA and prove beyond doubt that they are as good. Instead they go out there and form their own league which discriminates against men...Women's National Basketball Association.
This applies to a lot of sectors even here locally, you hear of Women's Law Association, Women's this and that, the list is endless but my knowledge has its limits. Let men do the same thing and they are accused of discrimination. So if you think about it women have more rights than males in more ways than one, so where is the equality in giving someone favour? Yes and this applies to BEE and affirmative action as well, once a person is given favour based on the colour of their skin instead of the merit of their abilities isnt that discrimination. It is simply turning the tables of apartheid, only difference is the level of violence..and yes I am black.
This applies to a lot of sectors even here locally, you hear of Women's Law Association, Women's this and that, the list is endless but my knowledge has its limits. Let men do the same thing and they are accused of discrimination. So if you think about it women have more rights than males in more ways than one, so where is the equality in giving someone favour? Yes and this applies to BEE and affirmative action as well, once a person is given favour based on the colour of their skin instead of the merit of their abilities isnt that discrimination. It is simply turning the tables of apartheid, only difference is the level of violence..and yes I am black.
Friday, March 16, 2007
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Women I know - 3
3. GOLD DIGGERS (Poly Students, College girls, Campus chicks, High School students etc - generally referred to as Weekend Accessories)
Advantages
* VERY, VERY GOOD IN BED (Holy Benjamin - Lord have mercy !!!wow!).
Disadvantages
* She makes sure she leaves you penniless. (Airtime, lunch, hair do, cosmetics, etc!!!) And then spends the money on her "real boyfriend
* She tells you she is on the pill, but she is pregnant within 3 months of the relationship.
*When ever there's a misunderstanding, she is quick to say you are using her (..but its quite the opposite (confusion at its best!!! )
* She sues for maintenance costs, especially if you are prominent and takes the story to the Lowvwlder, Mpumalanga Times....
* She is sexy isn't she? And that makes many of u DAMN!!!
Advantages
* VERY, VERY GOOD IN BED (Holy Benjamin - Lord have mercy !!!wow!).
Disadvantages
* She makes sure she leaves you penniless. (Airtime, lunch, hair do, cosmetics, etc!!!) And then spends the money on her "real boyfriend
* She tells you she is on the pill, but she is pregnant within 3 months of the relationship.
*When ever there's a misunderstanding, she is quick to say you are using her (..but its quite the opposite (confusion at its best!!! )
* She sues for maintenance costs, especially if you are prominent and takes the story to the Lowvwlder, Mpumalanga Times....
* She is sexy isn't she? And that makes many of u DAMN!!!
Women I know - 2
2. PROFESSIONAL / MILLENNIUM / WORKING - LADIES
Advantages
* She does not need your money
* She can lend you her car (latest model BMW/Volvo), u can boast to your friends that u have a connected Cherrie!! Pssst!!!
*You can even date other women with her car!!!
* She has a credit card and petrol coupon for u when you are down and out.
Disadvantages
* She is generally BAD IN BED. Its either she is too tired or doesn't just feel like it and u don’t have to wonder why we keep more than one of those at a time!!!.)
*You'll have take-away for dinner 6 times a week (AT LEAST!!)
* She thinks she owns you; more than your mother does sometimes.
* She hates your friends; u can't even go to the stadium once a month.
* She always tells you to get a better job, car, house etc. (the list goes on, COZ SHE MOST LIKELY EARNS MORE THAN YOU DO!!!)
* You won't have a life with this one. They have no respect; they will insult you / your mother in English and French....
Advantages
* She does not need your money
* She can lend you her car (latest model BMW/Volvo), u can boast to your friends that u have a connected Cherrie!! Pssst!!!
*You can even date other women with her car!!!
* She has a credit card and petrol coupon for u when you are down and out.
Disadvantages
* She is generally BAD IN BED. Its either she is too tired or doesn't just feel like it and u don’t have to wonder why we keep more than one of those at a time!!!.)
*You'll have take-away for dinner 6 times a week (AT LEAST!!)
* She thinks she owns you; more than your mother does sometimes.
* She hates your friends; u can't even go to the stadium once a month.
* She always tells you to get a better job, car, house etc. (the list goes on, COZ SHE MOST LIKELY EARNS MORE THAN YOU DO!!!)
* You won't have a life with this one. They have no respect; they will insult you / your mother in English and French....
Women I know - 1
1. HOUSEWIFE'S
Advantages
* She stays home and takes care of kids and household chores.
* She is always good in bed because she is never tired.
* Will always cook a good meal (NO NANDOS, KFC, etc)
Disadvantages
* You will never know what she does when you are at work.
* She behaves like your mother when you come home late.
* She bitches when you watch TV too long.
* You can't play your music loud.
Advantages
* She stays home and takes care of kids and household chores.
* She is always good in bed because she is never tired.
* Will always cook a good meal (NO NANDOS, KFC, etc)
Disadvantages
* You will never know what she does when you are at work.
* She behaves like your mother when you come home late.
* She bitches when you watch TV too long.
* You can't play your music loud.
Monday, March 5, 2007
Goodbye
Will be taking a break for sometime for myself, so you wont be seeing much of me in blogland. I will be back though when I have dealt with my demons.
Very much later
Very much later
What women want
So ever noticed how good intentions will never win as far as women are concerned, and it is always amazing how women misread men but what the hell.. Anyway have been asking about and my good friend toots came up with suggestions on how to keep them interested in you.
Hi Bafethu,
Well I have seen the way you always admire how toots has always kept his chick happy, for a change I thought I will tell you the secret. Believe me it works! That woman will love you forever. To all my female friends, I hope you agree with me hey. In fact I got a first prize for the hottest tips when I sent them to the Men’s health magazine. Here is my secret.
1. When she asks how she looks shrug and say "could be better" this will keep her on her toes. And girls love that.
2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. (Or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really, really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)
3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are like dogs. They love to be roughed up.
4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If she is, say you better be, repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. This will show her you care.
5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement. And every girl needs some improvement.
6. If you're talking to another girl, make sure she's looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words 'fuck you' and grab the other girls ass. Girls love competition.
7. Tell her you're taking her out to dinner. Drive for miles so she thinks it's going to be really special. Then take her to a burning tire yard. When she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really going to take her to dinner. Then drive her home. when she starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper very quietly into her ear "...because I can."
8. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick". Women love those special nicknames.
9. Play with her hair. Play with it HARD.
10. Warm her up when she's cold...and not by giving her your jacket………………then you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't stop bitching about the cold right now you're going to be bitching about a black eye." the best way to get warm is with fear.
11. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the parties dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party.
12. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things, like shadow boxing.
13. If you care about her never ever tell her. This will only give her self confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be.
14. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way she will go crazy.
15. Look her in the eyes and smile. Then clock her one. Girls love a spontaneous guy.
16. Give her one of your t-shirts......and make sure it has your smell on it. But not a sexy cologne smell. A bad smell. You know what I'm talking about.
17. Titty twisters and plenty of them.
18. Remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material objects aren't important. The only thing that’s important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.
19. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just when ever, take it and tell her you love it. Then next time you know she's coming over on a trash day leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that much but I think it's funny.
20. If she's mad at you for not calling her when you say you will promise her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call you're going to tell her a special surprise. Now she'll be really excited. Now don't call.
Thanks toots will definately keep those pointers in mind.
Hi Bafethu,
Well I have seen the way you always admire how toots has always kept his chick happy, for a change I thought I will tell you the secret. Believe me it works! That woman will love you forever. To all my female friends, I hope you agree with me hey. In fact I got a first prize for the hottest tips when I sent them to the Men’s health magazine. Here is my secret.
1. When she asks how she looks shrug and say "could be better" this will keep her on her toes. And girls love that.
2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. (Or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really, really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)
3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are like dogs. They love to be roughed up.
4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If she is, say you better be, repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. This will show her you care.
5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement. And every girl needs some improvement.
6. If you're talking to another girl, make sure she's looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words 'fuck you' and grab the other girls ass. Girls love competition.
7. Tell her you're taking her out to dinner. Drive for miles so she thinks it's going to be really special. Then take her to a burning tire yard. When she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really going to take her to dinner. Then drive her home. when she starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper very quietly into her ear "...because I can."
8. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick". Women love those special nicknames.
9. Play with her hair. Play with it HARD.
10. Warm her up when she's cold...and not by giving her your jacket………………then you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't stop bitching about the cold right now you're going to be bitching about a black eye." the best way to get warm is with fear.
11. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the parties dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party.
12. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things, like shadow boxing.
13. If you care about her never ever tell her. This will only give her self confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be.
14. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way she will go crazy.
15. Look her in the eyes and smile. Then clock her one. Girls love a spontaneous guy.
16. Give her one of your t-shirts......and make sure it has your smell on it. But not a sexy cologne smell. A bad smell. You know what I'm talking about.
17. Titty twisters and plenty of them.
18. Remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material objects aren't important. The only thing that’s important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.
19. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just when ever, take it and tell her you love it. Then next time you know she's coming over on a trash day leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that much but I think it's funny.
20. If she's mad at you for not calling her when you say you will promise her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call you're going to tell her a special surprise. Now she'll be really excited. Now don't call.
Thanks toots will definately keep those pointers in mind.
Monday blues
Had a fucked up weekend and I have only myself to blame for being so understanding to other peoples needs and ignoring mine when I know too well should the tables be turned they will always put themselves first but let me not sulk too much. I really sometimes wish I wasnt the way I am but I guess I will always be a goodguy. I swear the next woman who calls me 'sweet'/'like a brother'/'just a friend'etc, just might see how much of a gaping asshole I can be. Anyway was looking at relationships again thanks to a Sunday chill session with a couple of guys and I came to the realization that there are basically 4 kinds of relationships.
1. There is the main lover who is the stable guy/girl in your life, this could be your hubby or wife.
2. There is the friend of the opposite sex who you are usually attracted to but have never been intimate with because you are afraid it will ruin everything. You tell them of all your sexual experiences blah blah and you expect them to always pick up the pieces when you get hurt. Usually either one of you in the relationship wants to have their cake and eat it and in the end there is the possibility that you may ruin the relationship even by not doing anything.
3. There is the other person who you just click on a sexual level and you feel free to do things that you cant do with number 1 and would love to do with number 2 but never have.
4. Then is the occasional puff and pass, this can be someone who you wouldnt want to be seen with in public but who you shag either for the benefits (if you are female) or because everyone is shagging them and you just dont want to be left out.
Just remember your number 1 might be someone elses 2, 3 and even 4.
Later.
1. There is the main lover who is the stable guy/girl in your life, this could be your hubby or wife.
2. There is the friend of the opposite sex who you are usually attracted to but have never been intimate with because you are afraid it will ruin everything. You tell them of all your sexual experiences blah blah and you expect them to always pick up the pieces when you get hurt. Usually either one of you in the relationship wants to have their cake and eat it and in the end there is the possibility that you may ruin the relationship even by not doing anything.
3. There is the other person who you just click on a sexual level and you feel free to do things that you cant do with number 1 and would love to do with number 2 but never have.
4. Then is the occasional puff and pass, this can be someone who you wouldnt want to be seen with in public but who you shag either for the benefits (if you are female) or because everyone is shagging them and you just dont want to be left out.
Just remember your number 1 might be someone elses 2, 3 and even 4.
Later.
Friday, March 2, 2007
Ever changing technology
Ever notice how obsolete technology becomes once you own it, I mean when you have just bought windows 03 then comes windows 08, PSP then here comes PS3. I mean you spend so much time upgrading your software and then upgrading those upgrades you just get tired in the end. Got this e-mail.
Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition , Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity . Applications such as Poker Night 10.3 , Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Racing 3.6. I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!
Thanks,
Troubled User..
______________________________
REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:
This is a very common problem that men complain about. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under " Warnings-Alimony-Child Support" . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear"5.0 to alleviate software augmentation.
The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.
Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2
However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !
WARNING!!! DO NOT , under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition , Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity . Applications such as Poker Night 10.3 , Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Racing 3.6. I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!
Thanks,
Troubled User..
______________________________
REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:
This is a very common problem that men complain about. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under " Warnings-Alimony-Child Support" . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear"5.0 to alleviate software augmentation.
The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.
Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2
However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !
WARNING!!! DO NOT , under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
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