Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Never give up like Tsvangirai.
Grab opportunities like Mutambara.
Strive to grow like Zimbabwean inflation.
When they chase you away keep coming back like the zeroes on the Zim dollar.
And you thought nothing good could be said about the situation in Zimbabwe.
Due to a number of legal reasons we have been forced to stop Sondeza.com. We'd like to thank all our members for making Sondeza the best Adult Social network in SA. At this stage we are not sure how long it will take to bring Sondeza.com back to life again.
We'll be doing online marketing, consulting and website development.If you want your business to succeed online you can get in touch with us on firstname.lastname@example.org
Sondeza Admin Team
Visit Sondeza.com at: http://www.sondeza.com
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Am coming back to Nelspruit sometime next week.
Monday, October 20, 2008
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Here's something for all you medical know-it-alls:
Did you know that in the human body there is a nerve that connects the
eyeball to the anus?
It is called the 'anal optic nerve'. It's responsible for giving
people a 'sh!itty outlook' on life or for you Afrikaans know-it-alls
-'n kak gedagte.
If you don't believe it, pull a hair from your @ss, and see if it
doesn't bring a tear to your eye.
Interesting ain't it that some people wonder why their bum fluff exists????
Friday, September 19, 2008
Craziest thing I did so far was walk around my campus residency naked on spring day accompanied by two beautiful and equally naked women. So I just introduced the naked mile to Venda, too bad I didn't capture the whole thing on camera for Sondeza.com
Later,I have a shitload of assignments that refuse to write themselves.
Your uncle is back
Monday, August 4, 2008
Todays Proverb "It requires a lot of carefulness to kill the fly that perches on the scrotum" - Ghana.
This is what someone told Mbeki before he started talks with Bob, hence the quiet diplomacy. He knows better than to just swat the evasive bugger with a hammer causing more damage to his own country i.e, his balls. Some situations just need to be handled with care or they might backfire. Until then Kwakis your uncle.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Will try explaining an African Proverb in each post starting with "When a man is stung by a bee, he doesn't set off to destroy all beehives". This could be applied to people who just because they dated dead beat losers go on to take it out on the entire opposite sex. Could have also come in handy to George Bush after the 9/11 attacks and he wouldn't have invaded Iraq making a complte full of himself and ruining the lives of innocent people.
Saturday, July 12, 2008
"The man who marries a beautiful woman, and the farmer who grows corn by the roadside have the same problem" - Ethiopia.
"A short man is not a boy" - Nigeria and "No matter how hot your anger is, it cannot cook yam" - Nigeria.
"It requires a lot of carefulness to kill the fly that perches on the scrotum" - Ghana.
"If the throat can grant passage to a knife, the anus should wonder how to expel it" - Seychelles.
"The frown on the face of the goat will stop it from being taken to the market" - Nigeria.
"An old lady feels uneasy when dry bones are mentioned in a proverb" - Ghana.
"The same sun that melts the wax, hardens the clay" - Niger.
"If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there" - Uganda
"There's no virgin in a maternity ward" - Cameroon.
"A child can play with its mother's breasts, but not its father's testicles" – Guinea.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. why learn
"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk
"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep
One should love animals.
They are so tasty.
Money is not everything.
There's Mastercard & Visa
Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two
Practice makes perfect.....
But nobody's perfect......
so why practice?
Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.
A bus station is where a bus stops..
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station....
what more can I say.........
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Am feeling a bit cranky today, maybe I woke up on the wrong side of the bed ..... even though it is a single bed. There should be a better way to start a day than waking up every morning.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Mugabe was 56 when he became Prime Minister, elections where held on the 29th and it was on a Saturday..... Morgan is 56 and elections where held on the 29th and it was on a Saturday
Mugabe was 28 when MT was born , MT was 28 when Bob came to power in 1980 , MT will take power from Mugabe after ruling for 28yrs
Coincidence?I think not...........
Whose your uncle Bob?
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Monday, May 26, 2008
What can I do about all the sex, nudity, language and violence on my DVD player?
(Get a new DVD Player or new DVD's whichever will cost your stupid ass more)
Dear Uncle Kwaki
I am a twenty-three-year-old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive, and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.
(I think I know you)
Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?
(Because his own is ignorant, thats why)
Dear Uncle Kwaki
I joined the Navy to see the world.I've seen it. Now, how do I get out?
(I got married to have sex, now that I have had it how do I get out.... ok maybe yours is a bit complicated, try quiting)
My forty-year-old son has been paying a psychiatrist a visit an hour every week for two-and-a-half years. He must be crazy.
(Nice observation, must be hereditary)
Dear Uncle Kwaki
Do you think it would be all right if I gave my doctor a little gift?I tried for years to get pregnant and couldn't, and he did it.
(I am just confused here)
My mother is mean and short-tempered.I think she is going through her mental pause.
(Seems like your mental just stopped)
I read a certain Agony Aunties column where she told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor.Well, my husband lost all interest in sex years ago and he is a doctor.
(You got it bad)
Sunday, May 25, 2008
I suspected that my husband had been fooling around, and when I confronted him with the evidence he denied everything and said it would never happen again.
(Maybe he will make sure you dont get the evidence this time)
I was married to Lihwa for three months, and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.
(are you on drugs)
I have a man I never could trust. He cheats so much I'm not even sure this baby I'm carrying is his.
(You should get a D.N.A test and while your are at the hospital pass by the psychiatric ward)
A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher, and the other is a social worker in her mid-twenties.These two women go everywhere together, and I've never seen a man go into their apartment or come out.Do you think they could be Lebanese?
( ahh.... I dont even have a come back for this one)